My sense of Humor

hey guys, this psot dosen't really have anything to do with anything. I just wanted to give you a little insight into what I find funny. Chuck Norris Jokes are all the rage right now, and I love them, but I think that "Deep Thoughts" by Jack Handy, will be the time of humor that will be laughed at for generations and generations. So Here is a little taste, i hope you enjoy. If you do enjoy and want more, just let me know and I will give you more.

If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.

Better not take a dog on the space shuttle, because if he sticks his head out when you're coming home his face might burn up.

You know what would make a good story? Something about a clown who make people happy, but inside he's real sad. Also, he has severe diarrhea.

To me, clowns aren't funny. In fact, they're kind of scary. I've wondered where this started and I think it goes back to the time I went to the circus, and a clown killed my dad.

If you define cowardice as running away at the first sign of danger, screaming and tripping and begging for mercy, then yes, Mr. Brave man, I guess I'm a coward

I guess we were all guilty, in a way. We all shot him, we all skinned him, and we all got a complimentary bumper sticker that said, "I helped skin Bob."

Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis.

It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.

I loathe people who keep dogs. They are cowards who haven't got the guts to bite people themselves.

Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Achilles was supposedly the greatest warrior of all time, but he died because of his weak spot, the Achilles tendon. There is no Chuck Norris tendon.

Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him. 2

A man once asked Chuck Norris if his real name was "Charles". Chuck Norris did not respond, he simply stared at him until he exploded.

28. At the end of each week, Chuck Norris murders a dozen white people just to prove he isn't a racist.

The sun doesn't actually rise or set. Chuck Norris simply claps twice.

Chuck Norris cloned himself just to see if he could kick his own butt. The result was the second ice age.

Rather than "good intentions," Chuck Norris paved the road to Hell with the mangled corpses of the Viet Cong.

When Chuck Norris's wife burned the turkey one Thanksgiving, Chuck said, "Don't worry about it honey," and went into his backyard. He came back five minutes later with a live turkey, ate it whole, and when he threw it up a few seconds later it was fully cooked and came with cranberry sauce. When his wife asked him how he had done it, he gave her a roundhouse kick to the face and said, "Never question Chuck Norris."

Chuck Norris frequently signs up for beginner karate classes, just so he can "accidentally" beat the crap out of little kids.

Chuck Norris ruins the endings of Harry Potter books for children who just bought one for the heck of it. When they start crying Chuck Norris calmly says, "I'll give you something to cry about," and roundhouse kicks them in the face.